Funny and well written. You cleverly reeled us in by writing as though you weren't taking it too seriously, to what is a very serious topic.

My theory is that trauma can move your centre to the backseat of your mind as a sort of defence mechanism to create distance between yourself and what's happening. Whenever I feel more present, my centre seems to be at the very front of my head and body, and my voice, thoughts and everything else seems to comes from there with little effort. When I am in the backseat, it's easy to lose myself in a conversation because I feel like I have to concentrate on being 'here'. The distance is perceptibly larger. I guess my fear is that if I don't think and by doing so, control the situation, then I am just letting go and abdicating any responsibility.

I am a thought fiend though, so maybe I should keep quiet and take your advice.